Infected with Loneliness

Just as happiness is able to “infect” others with positivity, so too can loneliness infect others and spread like a virus. The difference between happiness and loneliness of course, is that the feeling of loneliness leads to greater negativity within one’s life. By understanding the way how both loneliness and happiness are able to affect ourselves and others, it will help us to realize ways in which loneliness can be eliminated from one’s life and where happiness can abound. The feeling of loneliness is never a nice experience and so hopefully the suggestions outlined here will help eliminated loneliness from your life. At the very least, this article will show you how loneliness is able to spread like a virus and how it is able to seemingly “infect” others.

No longer can loneliness be thought of as not having an effect on others outside of oneself. New research has discovered that it can spread like an infectious virus among groups of people. Interactions with others where negativity is being projected from those people have the ability to bring us down. The research has found that a lonely person is less trusting of others and as a result is further alienating themselves from others, which increases the level of loneliness experienced by that person. People who feel lonely will see things that people say negatively whereas those who are generally happy in their day-to-day lives will not have perceived that same thing in that negative way. In fact, they may not even notice that there was any such negative intent meant in what that person had said. An odd look or phrasing of something by a friend that would not even be noticed by the happy individual could be seen as an affront to a lonely person, which would in return trigger a cycle of negative interactions that would cause that lonely individual to lose friends and become even more lonely.

Study researcher John Cacioppo expressed his conclusion that “a lonely person who anticipates others are going to act negatively toward them finds evidence in their environment for that, partly because they anticipate it and partly because they elicit it”. Humans are social beings by nature and this is largely due to the overall aspect of consciousness as being an interconnected and unified whole, which is transpersonal in nature. By realizing that there is an interconnectedness not only among human beings, but among all living systems, we are able understand one of the reasons why we feel such a compulsion to interact with others. Unity and wholeness are principle aspects of our reality.

Getting back to the research, it was questioned how many degrees of separation exist for the “lonely virus” to infect someone. The result was that it takes three degrees of separation. What this means is that we are affected quite strongly by our friends’ loneliness, as well as that friends’ friends’ loneliness, and even that friends’ friends’ friends’ loneliness. If there is only one degree of separation to someone that was a direct connection to the another, a person is 52% more likely to feel lonely. I say connection because it does not have to be a friend, but can be someone that we interact with at a daily basis whether we choose to or not, such as an employer. As for further degrees of separation, for two degrees of separation, the number drops to 25% and then 15% for three degrees. The researchers further point out that “people with few friends are more likely to become lonelier over time, which then makes it less likely that they will attract or try to form new social ties”. This statement reminded me of the film Yes Man, where the character played by Jim Carrey becomes more and more alienated from friends and the social ties he had, because of his continuous response to any invitation by his friends to go do anything as being a “no”. He finally becomes so alienated that he barely has any friends left and is a very lonely person. This later changes but up to the point where he decided to make a fundamental change within his life and stop saying “no” to everything, the loneliness kept consuming his being.

In several studies on the subject, loneliness has been linked with various mental and physical illnesses, including depression, which demonstrates how these findings have some very practical implications and why it should be an issue of focus for those who continuously experience feelings of loneliness. There are many ways in which one can reverse the damage that loneliness has done to one’s life and social connections. What needs to be experienced, is the empathy and connectedness with others. By feeling this as a definite reality, one will naturally gravitate towards this higher emotional state of be-ing. High energy levels act as attractor fields or magnets and if a person is experiencing a negative state of mind brought about my solitude and loneliness, immersing oneself in these higher energy fields will help tremendously. You can start by not being as self-conscious of what you say and do. By interpreting everything in a negative light, you are hurting yourself and any prospects of the establishing of a strong and stable connection with someone else. See the glass as half-full and do not over-analyze situations or peoples’ actions/reactions. The reality of the situation is usually much more clear and direct than a person experiencing loneliness may realize.

A great way to shed the feelings of loneliness are to be proactive. Go out and be amongst people who seem as if they are radiating positivity. Be around others who are happy and who have strong social connections. Anything from parties, raves, festivals, celebrations, ceremonies, and other places where people get together and have a good time will be helpful towards this cause. Take the daring step to say hello and make new friends. There is nothing to lose by extending oneself outside the superficial boundaries that a person creates around themselves. Do not count on others to do this for you. You have the power of determining your future. Embrace this power and utilize it to its fullest potential.

Although its use is restricted in many parts of the world for one reason or another, the molecule MDMA, also known as Ecstasy, among other names, is able to create a fantastically strong bond between individuals, where the fundamental nature of reality being an interconnected Whole is experienced. If one is alone while having the MDMA experience, the feeling is a terrible one and becomes difficult to bear. Once a person becomes immersed into a sea of people, or even if it is just one other individual, he or she experiences that any and all feelings of loneliness that may have existed are now gone. The long-term effects of this experience are such that the person will have a more positive outlook on life and not have such feelings of intense loneliness as may have been the case before. These are facts verified by the administration of MDMA to thousands of patients by psychologists in the 1970s and although they are quite profound in a positive way, the legality of this molecule is not such where it is readily available at the local supermarket by the Aspirin. Since this is the case, we are unable to recommend its use. However, the facts concerning MDMA are presented here because the positive effects are the most instantaneous out of all the actions that can be undertaken by an individual to rid oneself of the feelings of loneliness.

Loneliness can be a terrible feeling to experience. The research that has been made in recent months and years demonstrates how infectious the feeling of loneliness is and how it can spread up to three degree of separation. Given this new information, people who experience loneliness can come to the realization of just how damaging this feeling is to their social connections and overall level of well-being in general. By interacting with individuals who are emanating positive energy and states of mind, the feeling of loneliness can dissolve and melt away. Do not become infected with the loneliness virus. Embrace the nature of being a human and form strong social connections. Live in love and positivity.